What I know for sure today

I am reading a great book Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Peter Scazzero. Today’s chapter really has me thinking.

I grew up being the pleasing child (I know some of you are laughing at this but it is true), after my mother died I swung that pendulum as far over to the opposite of that as I could in some areas of my life. I’m here to tell you that neither of these extremes are working for me.

What that chapter spelled out for me in black and white is that I am not serving myself well when I am working to please someone else. I need to be the person that God called me to be because when I am in His purpose, I am happy, my needs and desires are met and typically He is showing me something higher than I ever imagined.

So knowing this, what does this mean? Who am I? What is my purpose? What activities do I need to stop? Are there folks in my life that are unhealthy for me?

It’s funny, 10 years ago as my 40th birthday was approaching, I began to take spring cleaning very seriously. That year and every year since then, I do an evaluation of my life and I remove the activities and people who don’t fit. Today’s chapter in my reading let me know that was a step on the right path but there is more to do.

I am a very passionate person. If I am for a cause, or for a person I am all in 100%. If I am not however, it shows. I have never been able to hide my disdain for a person or activity, NEVER. And my health both physical and emotional take a toll when I am out of sorts with myself.

So today, as my 50th birthday is approaching, I am getting out the cleaning products and tools. Some things are not going to make the cut. This will be the biggest spring cleaning of my life. There will be exciting changes to come.

I know I was not made to be ordinary. I know I have experiences to share that will help someone else. I know that I have knowledge to share that will help my community and possibly the world. I know that I will find a spouse who will delight in who I am and not try to change me. But most importantly I know that one day when my mission is done I will hear “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

One of my proudest accomplishments are my children. I have wanted to be a mommy since I was 2 years old. Ask my siblings if I was a big sister or a jr. Mom. That said, I am asking that you help me to get to Africa to see Brittany and learn about being in service to the world. She is so excited to be able to share this aspect of her life with me.

I am asking everyone in my friends list to consider a donation. Every dollar helps. Thank you!

Here is my link:

gofund.me/nvsy6w

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